Have you ever noticed how our true selves tends to come to the surface when driving? If you ever want to get to know someone and how they respond to life, get behind the wheel and you will see. While some may get distracted at the sight of a beautiful sunset, others have an intensity to get where they are going. We all have our idiosyncrasies on the road, but I’m a laid-back driver. I’m never in a hurry to race to the next traffic lights but want to enjoy the views around me while driving, while listening to my favorite song. I have learned a lot about myself and others going through various seasons in my life, but I have noticed what drives me absolutely crazy! I can’t stand when I’m driving and I’m behind a huge trailer or some obnoxiously sized vehicle in front of me. I call them vision blockers! It’s in my way and I can’t see!!
My life is parallel. I’m often asked, “I don’t know how you do it?”, “
what keeps you going?” After losing loved ones to suicide, facing surgeries and up into the most recent, getting diagnosed with DCIS, a very treatable cancer. So, as I go about my daily life, trying to process all that has taken place, keep a focused mind and an intentional choice to love and appreciate life, I’m becoming more aware of myself and how I cope.
One of the biggest tools I have in my toolbox is VISION. I’m not referring the type where you might require assistance with the help of lenses, I’m referring to the one that lies between your ears. Your frontal cortex, the mega machine, the control panel that regulates cognition, emotion, so on and so on. I set goals, see them and achieve them. Jesus provides the perfect example for humanity to emulate as he was to face the cross. Hebrews 12:2 “Looking unto Jesus, the author and the finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Soak that thought in for a moment. If you believe it or occurred or not, just settle on that precious thought. Jesus had the joy set before him, which allowed him to endure what no human being should ever have to endure. He had VISION, it was you and me, The final outcome. Now realistically you and me could never measure up to attain such a goal, try as we might but the minute we get behind the wheel of a car, see how quickly you lose your temper! But that’s okay, we are delicate creatures and certainly not even close to match the character of Jesus. But we can look to him to see how he coped and endured. And for myself what I take most from that is he had a goal! He had VISION.
So, what does that look like for you and me. Our mission surely isn’t to sacrifice ourselves to a lost and dying world, for Jesus has already done that. I’m talking about how to you endure pain. What does it look like when you are suffering or facing a situation that seems impossible, that rattles you to your core? I can only share my experiences. I set goals and I keep them before me to endure what it is at any given moment to get through. I set goals that include joy! Even as I sit here recovering from a double mastectomy, monitoring and pain levels, I have VISION.
Let’s get back to my struggle as a driver. When something is in the way and I can’t see past it to get where I want to go, I get frustrated, I may even say a few choice words, rev the engine, ride their tail or develop a strategy to move past them. It’s very rare that I have the patience to sit and wait for the large, obnoxious vehicle to turn, so I try to manage what is blocking my vision. Basically, bottom line, you are in my way and you gotta go, so move thank you very much! Some see it as intense, others see it as impatient, I simply don’t care what your perception is!
This journey to have surgery has been the same. My vision, remove the cancer, take care of mental health and keep a positive mind while waiting. That was my goal. Anyone or situation that got in the way of my goal was a nuisance and an obstacle, which I lacked very little tolerance for! If you are not assisting in my goal and are hindering, then you are simply in the way and you gotta go! Abd believe when I tell you there is much negativity to contend with, just pick up the phone and call someone. They will find something to complain about or about a virus that may or may not come! I choose life, I choose to meditate on life and things that produce fruit. Worry, complaining and fear don’t check any of those boxes. You know what your mom taught you growing up as a child? “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all!” Well guess what, we live in a world full of stress and try as you might you cannot control the behavior of others, nor can you change them. Think of it this way, you are standing on a chair and trying to pull someone up. You will completely exhaust yourself trying to pull this person up to where you are. They have gravity on their side, you won’t win that battle, I don’t care how strong you are. It simply doesn’t work!
So now you have a choice! You know you can’t change the other individual, so you remove yourself and protect what you’ve got to where you need to go! You get to choose the company you keep, and you can’t change what is written, 1 Corinthians 15:33 “Do not be deceived, bad company corrupts good character!” Remove yourself to protect your VISION.
Remove the vision blockers that you are following when driving! They simply have to go. I know it sounds extremely calloused, but rest assure when I tell you there are very few people in the world that wake up thinking about you! If you are as fortunate as me, you will have a select few that you can count on one hand.
Ever think about how Jesus kept that goal in front of him? He was constantly sought after, wise, teaching, etc. He would go off alone at times and spend time with his father. He protected his VISION while keeping humanity in his frontal lobe! Simply astounding right! So, when you are faced with people constantly tugging at your legs because they need help. Their needs will never end, but don’t lose sight of your own needs to preserve and maintain what you’ve got. Get alone, spend time with him, find a hobby that brings you joy. Find something you can delight your heart in. It’s not selfish but self-care!
So, on that note, I’m getting to recovery. My goal is to continue to feed my body, mind and spirit! The goal I have set before me are 14 little faces in my preschool classroom and a newfound practice that I absolutely love. Yoga! Yet while I’m on the way to this journey I will find things that I delight in, a passion for people and a desire to help. So, I pray that during this journey that as I sit and reflect, that I am able to help someone else who is suffering or facing something extremely difficult. Words have power to create or destroy and if no one has told you today, you are important, and you are loved! May God bless you as you continue to set goals and push through the hard stuff!
IN DEEP WATERS 